If You Divorce for Sexual Immorality Can You Marry Again

MYTH: God forbids all divorce, or all divorce is sin unless information technology's for adultery.

TRUTH: Scripture shows that God gives permission for divorce in many situations.  And modern Bible translations no longer translate Malachi ii:16 as God saying "I detest divorce." The NIV, ESV, and CSB do not translate Malachi 2:16 equally God saying "I detest divorce."

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In my interviews with Christian divorcees, I've often heard that they stayed in an unfaithful or abusive marriage for decades because they were taught that divorce was a sin.

This myth says that all divorce is forbidden by God, sinful, and unpardonable in God'due south eyes—or, similarly, it says that Jesus or Paul never mention the topic of concrete or emotional abuse, and then those must not be biblical reasons for divorce.

In reality, Scripture shows u.s.a. God's permission for divorce in several places. In addition to infidelity, sexual immorality, and abandonment, emotional and concrete abuse is mentioned in the Erstwhile Attestation and repeated in the New Testament, just nosotros've never seen it because nosotros aren't looking for it. (Below is a short explanation; encounter Chapter 6 in The Life-Saving Divorce for a longer ane).

Jesus specifically allowed divorce for infidelity

Matthew 19:9 (ESV) And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.

Annotation that Jesus does not say this is the simply reason for divorce. Nosotros discover other reasons for divorce in Scripture. For a quick 7-minute video caption past Rev. Dr. David Instone-Brewer of Cambridge, meet this.

The Apostle Paul allowed divorce for abandonment

1 Corinthians vii:14-15 (NIV)

For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband; for otherwise your children would exist unclean, merely as it is, they are holy. Yet if the unbeliever leaves, let information technology exist so. The brother or the sister is not spring in such circumstances; God has called united states to live in peace.

The Law of Moses allowable divorce for neglect/corruption

The Law of Moses actually commanded divorce for breaking any of the 3 marriage vows in Exodus 21:10: food, clothing, and "marital rights," which can be defined as beloved,  equally we read in the New Testament passages earlier.

Exodus 21:10-xi (ESV)

If he takes some other wife to himself, he shall not diminish [the first wife's] food, her clothing, or her marital rights. And if he does not do these three things for her, she shall become out for nada, without payment of coin.

In the Book of Exodus, if a man took a second wife, it was confronting God's command to reduce the first wife'due south food, clothing, or marital rights (love). He was non allowed to bench her to slave status. If he was unwilling to treat her as a wife, he had to let her go and then she could marry someone who would care for her properly. This is the first fourth dimension that the Bible commands divorce.

The same was true for a prisoner-of-state of war wife who was captured during a battle. If a homo took a convict equally his married woman, he had to do her the award of letting her mourn before sleeping with her. Every bit his wife, she must be treated properly, not merely raped.

The Law of Moses required divorce in cases where a homo reduced his wife to a slave or tried to sell her. He had to allow her get and give her the liberty to ally someone else. The husband could not treat this woman whatsoever mode he wanted. She was either a wife with rights, or she had to be set free. This is the 2d time the Bible commands divorce.

"…if yous observe amongst the captives a cute woman and are attracted to her, you may have her as your married woman. Bring her into your abode and take her shave her head, trim her nails and put aside the clothes she was wearing when captured. Later she has lived in your house and mourned her begetter and mother for a full month, so you may go to her and be her husband and she shall be your wife. If y'all are not pleased with her, let her go wherever she wishes. You must not sell her or treat her equally a slave, since you lot have dishonored her." —Deuteronomy 21:xi-14 (NIV)

This sounds like abusive marriages today where a woman has no voice and no power. All she can do is obey, like a slave. Read more nigh this in Chapter 6 of the Life-Saving Divorce book, which looks at many Bible verses on divorce (including verses you may never have read before).

"When a man chooses to be calumniating, he breaks the covenant.
An abusive human forfeits the right to remain married..."
— Justin and Lindsey A. Holcomb [one]

The 3rd time the Bible commands divorce is in Ezra 9-ten. This is where Godcommands the men to divorce their foreign wives due to spiritual expose.

The Bible prohibited  divorce only 1 time

God protects woman who are victims of rape. In the Deuteronomy version of this poesy, information technology says the rapist tin honorably ally the victim (by paying the bride cost), but can never divorce her. The Exodus version of this verse says the father can withhold consent. He can but collect the bride price from the rapist and say no to the marriage.

Here's the betoken:  At that place is no "get out of jail free" card for a rapist.

A man was not allowed to rape a woman, then cover up his crime by marrying her, then plow around and divorce her under made-upward pretenses. Biblical law didn't permit that level of treachery. He had to care for her properly for the rest of his life.

At present not all Aboriginal Almost Eastern countries had such a tough law. Some only humiliated the rapist but nothing more. They didn't forcefulness him to provide for the woman at all, much less for the rest of her life.

God's 3,500-year-erstwhile law is improve protection than what many U.S. states accept today that allow child union. In the biblical law, the rapist couldn't divorce her. And if he abused her, she had the right to ask the courtroom for a divorce. And anybody knew information technology.

So we've learned that at that place are multiple places in the Former Attestation where divorce is commanded, and this is the 1 time when divorce is prohibited, and it all hinges on protecting the injured one from the oppressor.

In fact, God in the Volume of Jeremiah (Jeremiah 3:8), says he's the victim of serial adultery. So he divorced State of israel.  God himself a divorcee.

How tin nosotros exist so certain that abuse and substance corruption are serious in God's eyes?

God doesn't want calumniating people in the church. The campaigner Paul told the Christians in Corinth to finish their association with any sexually immoral, drunk, emotionally or financially abusive person.

1.  We should not associate with people who claim to be Christians simply are immoral. Not fifty-fifty to eat with them.

ane Cor five:eleven-12 (NIV)

But now I am writing to yous that you must non associate with anyone who claims to exist a brother or sister but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or slanderer, a drunkard or swindler.Exercise not even consume with such people.

2. We are not to be partners with Christians who have even a hint of sexual immorality, impurity, or greed. Such Christians are deceivers. They aren't going to inherit the Kingdom of God. We hear the verse about not being "unequally yoked" all the time, butthis poesy says we shouldn't be partners withChristians who do such things.

Eph v:3-seven NIV

But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people. Nor should at that place be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, simply rather thanksgiving. For of this you can be sure:No immoral, impure or greedy person—such a person is an idolater—has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God'southward wrath comes on those who are disobedient.Therefore do not be partners with them.

3. We tin and must talk about our spouse's bad behavior. It is not slander. This passage said that we must betrayal it and why.

Eph 5:11-13 NIV

Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather betrayal them. It is shameful fifty-fifty to mention what the disobedient do in hole-and-corner. But everything exposed by the light becomes visible—and everything that is illuminated becomes a light.

4. We tin call a spade a spade. We can call bad beliefs out, just the way the Bible does. We are to have zippo to do with such people. I know people will say this doesn't utilize to marriage, but that argument doesn't agree h2o.

2 Tim 3:1-5 NIV

But marker this: At that place volition exist terrible times in the last days. People will belovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, ill-behaved to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without beloved, unforgiving, slanderous, without cocky-command, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— having a form of godliness but denying its power.Have zippo to practice with such people.

5.  Those who practice non provide for their own family are the same equally those who refuse the faith.

Simply if anyone does not provide for his own, and particularly for those of his household,he has denied the religion and is worse than an unbeliever. —i Timothy five:eight

We can love them, forgive them, and still follow the biblical commands to become away from them. Nosotros are not called to detest them. Nosotros can divorce (or separate) and walk abroad. Perhaps they volition larn their lesson when they lose a spouse.

Of grade in that location are people who volition say, "These verses don't apply to marriage and divorce." Why not?  How can a pastor say these verses utilise to everything except spousal relationship?

• This behavior is and then bad that Christians are to be thrown out of thechurch co-ordinate to ane Cor 5:11-12 and Eph 5:3-7. If God wants the church to reject them,how can you ask a spouse to tolerate more than God does?

• If in God's eyes, this person does not inherit the Kingdom of God, and then they are an unbeliever. If they abandon their duty, Christians are given permission to divorce in one Corinthians 7:15.

• Jesus taught that marriage doesn't be in heaven. So one day we all stand before the Lord singly every bit individuals.

• Those who have abased their obligations to their spouse are too considered to have denied their faith, and are even worse than unbelievers. That situation falls into 1 Corinthians seven:15: abandonment by an unbeliever.

• In Exodus 21:ix-11, a hubby who reduced—or didn't provide—food, vesture, and marital rights to his wife was required to let her go free (presumably to marry someone who cared for her better). Wives couldn't be demoted to concubine status or slave status. The married man simply had two choices: care for her properly, or let her go.

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Does the Bible quote God as saying: "I Hate Divorce"? No! Bad Translation

The Hebrew doesn't say, "I hate divorce" or "God hates divorce." The translation of this verse from the ancient Hebrew language to English language is incorrect. [2] The earliest English language Bibles (Wycliffe, Geneva, Bishops, and the Slap-up Bible) didn't interpret it equally "I hate divorce" or "God hates divorce." And the three near recent English Bibles don't either.

This poesy is non nearly God's anger at divorce, only his anger at hypocritical, unfaithful, violent husbands who dump their wives without just crusade.

Malachi 2:xv-xvi can be translated from Hebrew to English like this in the New International Version of the Holy Bible.

So be on your baby-sit, and practice not be unfaithful to the wife of your youth. "The man who hates and divorces his wife," says the Lord, the God of Israel," does violence to the one he should protect," says the Lord Omnipotent. Then exist on your guard, and exercise not exist unfaithful. —Malachi 2:15b-16 (New International Version, NIV, accent mine)

The aforementioned verses in the English language Standard Version read like this:

…let none of you be faithless to the married woman of your youth. "For the man who does non love his wife but divorces her," says the Lord, the God of State of israel, "covers his garment with violence," says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not exist faithless. —Malachi 2:15b-16 (ESV, emphasis mine)

The Holman Christian Standard Bible published by Lifeway (Southern Baptist Convention), translated information technology like this. (And the revision of the HCSB, the Christian Standard Bible, treats that phrase the same way):

And then watch yourselves carefully, and practice non act treacherously against the wife of your youth. "If he hates and divorces his married woman," says theLORD God of State of israel, "he covers his garment with injustice,"at says theLORD of Hosts. Therefore, watch yourselves carefully,and do not act treacherously. —Malachi 2:15b-xvi (HCSB, accent mine)

God is not confronting all divorce. God is against treacherous divorce, divorce where the vow breaker abandons the true-blue spouse.

And God is also confronting treacherous treatment of spouses, such every bit abuse, abandonment, fail, and exploitation, as we've already seen.

In this Bible passage—the first 3 chapters of the volume of Malachi—God says he is fed upwards with his people's disrespect toward him and their disregard of his covenant with them. God threatens to cut off the covenant with Judah.

God rebukes and warns them due to their many betrayals, including the following:

• Judah disrespects God by violating the covenant. The priests crook God by non offering the appropriate sacrifices (1:6-viii).
• Judah profanes God by marrying foreign women who serve strange gods, leading to spiritual adultery (two:11).
• Judah has been unfaithful by dealing treacherously with the wife of his youth, fifty-fifty though she has been his companion all these years (two:14).

This entire passage is nearly breaking promises. And God'southward hatred toward divorce is focused on those who break the marital contract past doing incorrect and interim treacherously.

Start, we see the Lord is angry with the people and no longer accepts their offerings with favor.

Malachi ii:13 (NASB)

"This is another thing you do: you cover the altar of the Fiftyord with tears, with weeping and with groaning, considering He no longer regards the offering or accepts information technology with favor from your hand."

Why won't God take their offerings? Because of treachery and marrying the daughter of a foreign god (possibly pregnant worshiping other gods).

Malachi 2:xi (NASB, accent mine)

"Judah has dealt treacherously, and an abomination has been committed in State of israel and in Jerusalem; for Judah has profaned the sanctuary of the LORD which He loves and has married the daughter of a strange god."

What kind of treachery does God condemn? Betraying the wife of your youth, who has been your companion and is legally your wife past the marriage covenant. Why?

Malachi 2:14 (NASB)

"Yet you say, 'For what reason?' Because the Lord has been a witness between you lot and the married woman of your youth, against whom y'all have dealt treacherously, though she is your companion and your married woman by covenant."

The treachery behind this makes God angry. He hates divorce past those who get rid of their wives wrongly.

Malachi two:sixteen (ESV, emphasis mine)

"For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her," says the Lord, the God of Israel, "covers his garment with violence," says the Fiftyord of hosts. And then guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not exist faithless.

Notice God'due south summary statement: "So baby-sit yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless." God doesn't say, "Don't divorce for any reason." In fact, nosotros run into Israelites returning from exile taking vows earlier God to divorce their foreign wives who depict them away from their faith (Ezra nine-10).

It is treachery that God hates. God permits divorce, as long equally it is justified.

And it's non simply the translators of the New International Version, the English language Standard Version, the Holman Christian Standard Bible, and the Christian Standard Bible that know this poesy has been translated incorrectly. Many Bible scholars have pointed this out, but to no avail. Our churches and Christian marriage authors and radio broadcasters either don't know, or they don't want to know. Despite our proclamations that nosotros Christians "handle the Discussion of God rightly," I suspect that our leaders would prefer to ignore this rather than tell people the truth, that God does non hate all divorce. I suspect they fear opening the floodgates to divorce. I understand that. As a committed Christian myself, I don't desire to open up the floodgates to frivolous divorce either. Surely in that location is sensible option where nosotros tin can approve of life-saving divorces without approving of immature sinful divorces. For more on the Bible and divorce, see Affiliate vi, of the Life-Saving Divorce.

Since God hates treachery toward wives, nosotros tin can conclude this:

Divorce is not testify of moral disuse in society.
Tolerating calumniating marriages is.

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Footnotes:

1 Justin Holcomb and Lindsay Holcomb, "Does the Bible Say Women Should Endure Abuse and Violence?" JBC 28, no. 2 (2014), accessed 12/13/xix, http://justinholcomb.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/Does-the-Bible-Say-Women-Should-Suffer-Abuse-and-Violence-Holcomb.pdf Justin is a frequent correspondent to The Gospel Coalition blog.

2  Link to Hebrew-English interlinear online for Malachi two:16. Link to side-by-side chart comparing 18 English language Bible translations of Malachi ii:sixteen shows that "God hates divorce" is only ane of three translations published in the past 500 years.

Other noteworthy pastors and theologians say emotional and physical abuse are biblical grounds for divorce.

• Sermons from pastors who believe abuse is grounds for divorce.
• List of theologians and pastors who believe corruption is grounds for divorce.
• Training video for pastors who want to train their staff the bones of domestic violence and abuse awareness.
• Nearly 3 in four Protestant Pastors accept divorce for corruption, and say it is not a sin.

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Scholarly books on biblical reasons for divorce:

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